Monday, November 30, 2009

An Interesting Day

Yesterday we came home from Church and Lauren wasn't acting right, she took a nap that lasted nearly all day… a low grade fever but No other symptoms, slept all night, still no real sick symptoms says she feels fine, she is just tired…Hmm, Mama doesn't buy that, but I will let her sleep until she FEELS better anyhow.


 

Today I get up, follow my routine, she gets up, and by noon she is napping again, and she slept until after 5, yea, at 8 she is still up, but guess what, she is going to bed within the hour, and she will be ok. The low-grade temp has broken; she is sipping chamomile tea and is feeling a bit better.


 

On the other hand of the day I checked my face-book I catch up with a few friends on there and got a scare of my life, my darling cousin posts that she will miss an aunt on there…Hmm, I call family, I knew she was in hospice (she is significantly older, mid 90's but, I had spoken to her grandson earlier this week, and was positive I would have gotten a call if she had passed, NOT read it online…anyhow, when I called my parents, no one knew what was going on, and an aunt had asked in reply to her post…so a lot of mess had to be cleaned up… It made me grateful I used common sense and called my family instead of sending a sympathetic email to my cousin (her grandson whom I talk to) The cousin who posted that she would be missed was not close to her or her family, I on the other hand talk to her children and grandchildren and was practically raised with them…so I really needed to step back and pray for a lot of wisdom on how to handle the situation today.


 

I was extremely stressed out…I know the 6 degrees of separation seems to really show a lot of things for a lot of people, but for me it hit home a lot, I easily could have read that, my grandmothers sister had died, and sent sympathies to two people whom I am close to, Her daughter (whom is already under a lot of stress (her husband just had Heart Bypass surgery a couple weeks ago and has recently lost part of a foot or maybe both feet (I don't recall since the story that has been passed on has been complicated by getting the info from 3 different people and she has been at the hospital and nursing home with him) and her Grandson, my cousin... I talk to my cousin periodically, I don't talk to his mom as often, but his mom is who led my dad to the Lord, who introduced me to Church, and really helped make me who I am.

This very sweet woman is still alive; her children are with her, hospice is there, I pray she has come to know true salvation, beyond religion. Her husband passed about 5-6 years ago, so she is definitely ready to go, I just found the face book post offensive since it was tacky and even more so when I discovered trying to hunt down when she died….that she was STILL alive…I am so GLAD I did not wish her child (fortunately, I am not close to her other children or I might not have had some forethought) or grandchildren


 

Well In other thoughts,
After having a VERY rough morning, I had a good afternoon, got some stuff accomplished, and now my evening is running on empty I am tired and worn out, I did A LOT of stuff while I felt good and dummy me forgot that my body can only do so much….so when I uhm uhm finished my projects…I started HURTING, lol…Oh well…I will survive.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Bed-ridden? Maybe that should say Couch-ridden?

For the first time in about 5 weeks I have only left the couch about 4 times today. Usually my pain follows this wonderful little tool on www.weather.com under the aches and pains tabs for arthritis and other ailments that normal people have, but for some reason, this month…well, it hasn't.

Almost daily I have struggled through the pain, but I keep trying to do what needs to be done.

We have started our winter break from school, Lauren is helping with Thanksgiving preparations, we are having a small Family only Thanksgiving, and by family only I mean just the 3 of us…my in-laws want to get together on Saturday or Sunday, Sunday is off limits (I can't handle multiple things in a day) and I am not holding my breath on Saturday since it will all be hinged on how I feel after Thursday (and I am not depriving my family of Thanksgiving dinner ON Thanksgiving)

We will be having a simple healthy Thanksgiving this year, in the past I went all out and made the FULL meal, but this year we are incorporating parts of it into our education and this will be Home-economics for Bug, she will be helping make the meals and will be learning How to stretch Tom as in "Toy Story" from so many years ago "to Infinity and beyond" lol.

Our dinner Thursday will consist of Tom the Turkey, a 21lb bird, purchased for $2 after all discounts were applied from Meijer, Real Mashed Potatoes for Chris, and Jarred Gravy (Since I want stuffing and he does not, I am only mashing 2 potatoes, saves waste, AND temptation) I cheat on stuffing, I doctor stovetop Sage by adding Celery and Onion and use Broth instead of water and bake it, I have been making it this way for 5 years, since Bug and I are the only stuffing eaters, and we only eat it with turkey, I don't mind using the boxed stuff (it's the same as jarred gravy, we don't use gravy with mashed potatoes the rest of the year, but I do have a recipe for Cider au jus that I want to try next time I get some GOOD cider)

For Veggies, We have our Garlic Green Beans, I will also make cranberry relish (Sugar free raspberry jell-o added to Canned Whole Berry Cranberry Sauce, Walnuts, celery and a Whole seeded apple (recipe calls for pineapple, but that's higher in sugar, so I substitute) I freeze all leftovers

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

I’d Rather Have the Flu

Ok, frankly I am getting tired of feeling sick and whiny, I do not remember the last day I felt good, and Honestly, if I wasn't married to the most wonderful husband God had picked out for me (isn't it great when you have to quantify that statement because your readers would argue the best man in the world statement because they all have wonderful husbands too?) I wouldn't be able to smile, it makes my head hurt worse.


 

I do not remember the pain being this relentless for this long since I was in my early teens perhaps about 14ish maybe 15 right about the time I had my first Spinal Tap, so right about the time my pressures started going haywire…just a hypothetical here, but my guess, that's probably about the time the Chiari started acting up but it was likely just a Chiari Zero then, and NEVER would have been caught all those years ago, so the PTC literally may have saved my life…either way, I am getting tired of being miserable and cranky all the time… All I want is a HUG and a Pillow and a shoulder to cry on, someone who understands…I have prayed, I have cried out and I have begged and PLEADED with God to take this away, OH Please, I am so sick and tired of People being Cliché, God will never give you more than you can handle, HA, yes he does, if he didn't, you would NEVER call on him…HE never said he wouldn't give you more than you could handle…He said "My Grace is Sufficient" He Said " Take Joy in your Suffering" HE SAYS, " I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me Strength" Ok, that one is the closest one I can fall back on during my trials and actually say Hey it's in the word…But I can't find a verse that says You won't give me more than I can handle… at least not in my King James Bible…I have looked… I believe he allows us to go through those trials as far as we can trust him to lead us, for him to strengthen us….when we have learned to lean FULLY on him, those trials, stay put or stop for a while, when we are ready, they begin or new ones begin again….without tests, there is no testimony.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Changes are Coming

Lauren is going to be thrilled to death… For the first time in our 5 year homeschooling history she will get a 6 week bookwork break for the Holidays—

We do not celebrate the holidays like normal people do, so we are going to be doing some major Holiday oriented Unit studies on why we do not celebrate them the way others do. We will be going over quite the variety of materials for Christmas, including the Ultimate gift.


 

We will also be limiting the number of TEXT books we will be using for her spring semester, I have NEVER liked using books, but this year was different and while we will finish the curriculum we have purchased, I do not think we will buy most of it again, we are not a text book family, and I can see its really held her learning back this year as I have been evaluating where she is and has been.

We started off this year supposed to be starting Second Grade, I did a placement test because we were starting a new curriculum and I wanted to place her in the appropriate level for their curriculum…Lo and Behold, she placed in 3rd grade and a little higher in some subjects…I was a very happy mom. Unfortunately, while she started off gung ho and worked really efficiently in August, September moved a bit slower, by October I was hearing almost every day, This is boring and I don't like this work… before I get slammed with "you're the boss" comments or emails, remember, I know my child best, and I have looked at her work, I have looked at this work she is doing She is VERY justified in being bored with it and it's just not at her level in any way, even though the book says 3rd grade some of them even as far as the 4th month of 3rd grade, they just do not hold her interest because they are mostly reading, she has been reading for 4 and a half years, I figured since these were 3rd grade books there would be grammar and stuff in them by now, but this has barely covered nouns and she is bored to tears with basics still.

We will be switching gears to Note booking and using the resources in our text books for this next semester (and eliminating a lot of useless information that she already grasps…so, I will be doing A LOT of hands on work with her, but that's fine with me…it will be fun for us both) We will be doing ONE 2" Binder for 3rd grade and I will decide if we will do a new one for each grade or what we will do, it will depend on how I like note booking and how it works for us basically, its lap booking simplified, so we will be taking a bit of time to work through a portfolio of sorts…if you read my earlier post, I feel God is leading my heart to prepare, for some reason I also feel at some time in the future he may be moving us and I am not sure where, but if he moves us to a not so home school friendly state, I need a portfolio ready to go, because those records need to be kept for them…yes, Michigan does not require them, but not every state is as blessed as we are.


 

So, Unit Studies, here we come, Math and Language Arts, Back to the Basics, Here we come, Everything else, can be covered in a unit study, I am not going to try to cover things in individual books, it's too much work and I felt we lost a lot of ground and school became a war, and Frankly, I prefer not fighting a war not worth fighting…She is a smart kid, VERY Smart, so why am I losing the battle here?


 

Friday, November 13, 2009

Prepare for the future

Frugal Bloggers Beware...

Ok, a lot has been on my mind, God has been once again laying preparedness on my heart.

The one thing that keeps coming back to my mind though is that my family is not that of just 3, but we have 2 feline companions and I do not feel we are to forget them in our preparing.

I read numerous weblogs that show frugal families monthly budgets which include pet food, but when you look at their stock ups, there is not a single months worth of surplus for their pets... and their oldest children are the age of my only child. This week then, I read this fabulous blog on living off her surplus for 2 full years (mind you this blogger does NOT claim to have pets, but still, they had to live off their food storage for two years, not a few extra weeks here or there)

So I have been thinking, Perhaps, while I am stocking my pantry, maybe we should put up an extra bag of food (we buy a 3 month supply for Zeke and Ebony to begin with) just in case, yes, much more than that would go rancid, but we do keep an extra case of litter so an extra container of food would make sense too…

I would love to learn to live entirely off of storage and am going to start planning meals using my stored food before grocery shopping and using the store to fill in gaps; fortunately I shop sales, use coupons and shop in unexpected places; Dollar General has awesome steals in their Non Perishable foods as do some of the dollar stores... at this point in our lives we have not used food pantries because we have not needed them as of yet. God has provided meat when there was no money, (free Buffalo came when finances didn't) I have always stocked sales when we had money, so even if it wasn't favorite veggies, they were there… (Green beans and broccoli run out before corn and mixed veggies) and I stock and rotate beans like there is no tomorrow and ROTEL tomatoes what I have is not nearly what most families even consider to be enough, but, it's a start. There is always something on hand to make Chili and various other concoctions but, sometimes you have to accept that it may not be what you are in the mood for.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

The bad day that WILL NOT end

I am tired, I am crabby…and my day just does not seem to want to end today, or is it yesterday?


 

I have had the same headache that won't let up now for going on about 2 weeks (we won't get technical and call it as it REALLY is and say it's been over hum, almost 5 straight years, but we will just give since the last reprieve when I had a drop in level and had a good day slide in, with pain levels evening out, I think it was about 2 weeks ago…anyhow, I am not happy about the pain levels I have been in…its stressing my family to ridiculous levels.

Add in to that today I decided it would be fun to fall through the hole in the floor, mind you, that hole was not there BEFORE I decided it was time to take my shower and get ready for class today, I put it there by walking across the heat vent (which now needs replaced since I fell THROUGH it) Apparently in my graceful lack of balance my heel caught the edge of the vent, I broke about 6 of the slats that protect the vent (from what I am suddenly unsure of, since they certainly didn't protect it from me, nor me from it and now it is a danger to everyone who has to cross it, and wouldn't you know it's the one in the smack center of the house)

Anyhow, after 15 minutes of Chris trying to help me up and stepping on my foot to keep me from falling in the vent AGAIN, Loving husband he is he did' NOT want to see me fall in again…for that I am extremely grateful. I took my shower and headed to class, now, my bad leg has an added limp and is very sore, but I can't tell if I caused more damage or if I reinjured an old injury…needless to say, unless it becomes unbearable to walk on, I am NOT going to get it checked on, and if I do, it will just be the PCP, he will decide if I need to call my neuro and my rehab docs…Gotta love when I lose MY balance…funny thing, I stepped OVER stuff so I wouldn't fall and fell anyhow. I am so worn out from trying to stay healthy I think it's killing me.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Venting

As I sit here with my pounding headache thinking about today, I checked my email and became very frustrated.


 

I have come to the conclusion that I do NOT want a shunt regardless of what the recommendation comes at this point. I have done my homework. I have done the Long term research, Angela, an acquaintance in Columbus via a friend I have been praying for her daughter for more than 3 years now (since during her pregnancy) has PTC and has had multiple shunt surgeries LP and VP and the BEST hospital in the Midwest OSU Columbus, by the Best Surgeons, to remain nameless on this blog for personal reasons due to potential readership. Anyhow…Her headaches are back full force WITH a functioning shunt, My pressures went up to 38 with a functioning shunt… if the vision is intact, a shunt may not do any good at all and remission is totally possible without surgical intervention, I and MANY others have experienced it, in fact, my shunt was after having PTC for uhm 3 full years, yes, I had to treat my vision first, but the headaches I learned to live with…just like I am now. The Topamax relieves them somewhat, ya, I know, I am on disability, but get real, I have Chiari, and I have a partially paralyzed leg, It works when it wants to, and that's intermittent at best.


 

Today, did you wallow in the self pity of your pain or did you do something for someone else?

I know what I did… Do you want to know what I did?

I went and helped teach Children's Church like I do when necessary. We are working on the Beatitudes with our class of 7-9 year olds, they are making Memory cross Lap books and they are coming together nicely.

The lead teacher was getting a gift (just because she is a good friend, and to illustrate the concept of Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for Righteousness sake, for they shall be filled. I made a smelly Jelly jar…

We started with the Pre-fragranced smelly seeds (too much work to add fragrance there or later) and I added the little bit of seeds to the Pint Jar, and asked if it filled the jar, the kids all said NO!

Put a Tiny bit of water in and asked if God could fill us with that little bit? The seeds grew a little…, should have colored and taken pictures, but it was kinda improvised, not really planned ahead

Then we filled the jar with water and finished most of our crossed and looked at the jar before we left, the crystals had completely filled the jar in less than a half hour, the children were amazed that it took almost no time, and we explained that God fills us as completely as we let him too.


 

We can't wallow in whatever life throws at us, we have to move on and take what life gives us and move on. God can use whatever he blesses us with.