Friday, June 13, 2008

Whine

Today I am in a whiny mood. My head still isn't cooperating, my aim is to at least make it to my appointment on July 14th without making a trip to the hospital first.

Poor Chris finally got an earful this morning. I ALMOST feel sorry for him, he whines at me all the time over anything that bothers him, but today it was my turn.

I did not sleep well last night, I was up til well after 11pm and back up at 5:30am, yes, I am very tired, but have lots to do this week, so no time for real rest.

My CPAP machine seemed to be smothering me last night, I just could not breath against the air pressure. Not to mention the fact that the last thing I wanted to do was actually get sick with it on, eewwe gross. So it came on and off a lot last night.
I had a chaffe spot where my ph is off. I have been sponge bathing because getting in the shower is very hard, and my balance is off as soon as the ground gets wet, but last night I was determined to take a bath because I figured a good soak would help the nausea and the sore spot, HA, that didn't work, I could not get down on my knees to SIT in the tub, I wasn't goign to run the water til I was in and I am so glad I didn't because I would have been stuck in the bathtub half in and half out while everyone else was asleep..I will have to talk to Cathy about that, I NEED to be able to sit in the tub or on the floor without feeling like I am going to die.

Then I came back to bed again, and just basically struggled to get to sleep til almost 11, now I am used to going to bed by 9 at the latest lately this was VERY hard.

For the most part, life does not get the better of me, I don't believe in complaining since it doesnt make me feel better, today I just really needed to get things off my chest. I really do not feel like God has abandoned me, but rather he is trusting me with a lot of things that I don't feel qualified to handle...its a good thing that HE is really the one who handles these things huh?